Story Time!

by Liam

Wow, it hurts to get shot with an arrow. Is that what I’ve been doing to the kobolds? I should probably feel guilty- but I really don’t. I’m thinking of keeping that arrow as a souvenir. Maybe my Mom would like it.

So things didn’t go so well this time out. In fact, it’s all so hazy it seems almost like I wasn’t really there… But the goblins were there; five of them. These guys had bows, but they just can’t shoot as well as we do (except for that lucky hou zi de pi gu who shot me). I hadn’t realized just how BIG orcs are, though. Big and scary, but they bleed just as well as kobolds when they get cut. And wouldn’t you just know it, the new guy (Fletch) stole my gag – he shot one of our guys!!!

We limped back to town to get fixed up. After a few days, we headed back out to look for the lock that fits the key we found, which seems a little bass-ackward. Nobody asked me for advice, so I decided to leave the heavy thinking to the biggers and just follow Ninny’s instructions. The biggers went running (uphill??) to attack this mine we found. It went surprisingly well, and we managed not to shoot any of our own party, but this one big ugly half-orc mudsucker just kicked our collective butts. Then he stopped to take a pee- biggers are just NUTS, no matter what species. And then… DumbO went monkey-poo!! He picks up this axe about half his own size, and used the spiky bit to stab the halfbreed right in the twig-and-berries! It was like watching an ox getting savaged by a kitten. Funniest thing I’d ever seen, but only for a few seconds. Then the Mountain of Ugly swings his weapon around and cuts DumbO into two pieces. Like a gorram apple!

That seemed to annoy everybody who was still upright, so (without even discussing it) we gave the halfbreed a new nickname- Arrow-Boy. Eventually we finished him off.

Lucky for us the dead guy is the smallest one in the party- I’d hate to have to carry a bigger’s corpse all the way back to town. Oh, and I need to remember to ask Ninny – which half is the “pixie” and which half is the “fairy”?

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